Today's service was good, because for the first time ever since adopting the new faith, I literally felt something special. After service was good too, because I went to Joel's house to study with him. The confiding was really comforting, and I just wanna thank God for such a wonderful friend. Apart from that, I did the MJ mathematics paper as well, which was far from satisfactory because I couldn't finish in the 3 hours I've given myself. I need to be more focus, and definitely more alert when dealing with all these so that I wouldn't be wasting any more time on a single question. Otherwise, I thought the paper was ok because somehow I was able to solve all the questions! I hope that had been the results of the practices I've gotten myself to embark on recently, and may I continue to build upon it. I do not want to over stress myself, but I do not want to slacken down as well! The current pace looks good, and may I just continue to thrive in that! On top of that, I also wrote an essay which is due later. I think I'm pretty happy with that piece of work, and hopefully that would be a confidence boost for myself that would sustain me through the course of the entire journey, considering how convinced I am that the Prelim's essay had been a total flop! Perhaps it was because of that satisfaction that I yearn to write more, henceforth my presence here, writing another entry for my blog. *nod*

I think I'd like to elaborate a little more on whatever God has told me this morning in the service hall. I got that inspiration from a book I saw at one of the book stores in Changi Airport about this guy who spoke to God and got a reply from Him in a unique way. Today, I guess I've had that experience as well. It's just beyond words, but the message goes like that:

God desires us to trust in Him, but the growth in faith does not mean to follow blindly. Salvation is for those who are lost, and then found again. Even though the bible says that "the fear of God is the beginning of all wisdom", it is always all right for us to question Him, to ask Him why, for that is the only way we could know Him better. Convincing yourself that "He must have a greater plan" stops only there, but probing to find out why's such plan even in place is the extra mile that each of us should go in order to really understand Him. Instead, continue to trust in Him as you probe because you're indeed aware that He has a far greater plan for us, yet do not hold back to find out more. Habbakuk's one such person- trust and ask. At the end of the day, perhaps one would be surprised by the extent to which the probing has helped him grow.

At the beginning (non-believer): curiosity about the relationship and love leads us to desire to find out.

Then (convinced): convinced that He's so real, trust in Him forever more and just trust in Him, regardless of all else.

Realisation (me): After getting into the relationship, take a step back to assess this relationship, by enquiring and by learning, to grasp a bigger picture of what the entire thing is about.

Finally (re-entering the relationship with a greater love): the realisation is bound to make us love Him ever more for that we become aware of the things He does for us, we got totally awed by His wonderful character.

Luke 11: 9-10

"And so I tell you, keep on asking, and you will be given what you ask for. Keep on looking, and you will find. Keep on knocking, and the door will be opened. For everyone who asks, receives. Everyone who seeks, finds. And the door is opened to everyone who knocks."