Unfortunate how the indifference has set in. I so desire that the same indifference, if not more, will set in to the worldly wants. How can study ever become the core of life, yet so many decline to be crowned the name of a mugger. Indeed many of you all are! On the day of appreciation, to the people who have guided us thus far, and somehow, Kah and me were the only 2 who went back. The teachers are in good shape, at least that's a comforting knowledge. Liu lao shi seemed to have aged quite a bit since the last time. And the school has changed so much. Somehow, I felt like reminiscing the past, of the days where I first stepped into the compound; about the lessons we had; about the time when we painted our classroom. Thanks Kah for accompanying me back, else I would really have gotten lost in the maze of unfamiliarity. Unhomely? Unwelcoming? How about just because we are not used to it?
ARE ACADEMIC ACHIEVEMENTS THE SOLE PURPOSE IN OUR LIVES? SO WHAT IF WE BECOME THE MOST SUCCESSFUL PERSON IN HISTORY? WE COME TO THE world EMPTY-HANDED, AND ISN'T THAT HOW WE ARE GONNA LEAVE IT?
Posted by Judah at 8/31/2009 07:07:00 AM
Sunday, August 30, 2009
30th August. It's one of the rare events that I've and am organsing for the Lord, more like how He had called upon us to do His work. But before that, I had another refreshing cleansing from God Himself. An external pastor came to our church to deliver a sermon on teacher's day. His words were so powerful and it was a good sermon! Definitely=) remain child-like as we depend on Him=)
The afternoon event was really good. A good 14 turn outs, with many more expected to make it for the next one, if we ever have one that is. Really glad Rachel came back to join us=) Facing the giant is a great film that everyone should watch=)
the encouragement who came=)
Posted by Judah at 8/30/2009 06:19:00 AM
Saturday, August 29, 2009
Verse of the day:
It has always been my ambition to preach the gospel where Christ was not known, so that I would not be building on someone else's foundation.
~Romans 15:20
The verse came to me twice. Is that God's calling? To reach out to the non-christians? May the Lord bless us with further affirmations, and wisdom and guidance in all we have to do.
Posted by Judah at 8/29/2009 08:01:00 AM
Guide me Lord!
Posted by Judah at 8/29/2009 07:30:00 AM
Hm. I'm wondering who I could really speak to. Not because of the cutting off accusation I was subjected to in the tag board, but rather very much because of the growth and maturity. After getting past certain phase, bitching and gossiping have really detached from me, at the very least when I'm conscious about them. Indeed, God's instructions have been good. He taught me not to expect; He taught me not to make negative comments; He taught me to be slow to anger but quick to love; He taught me to be harsh on self but gentle to others. He taught me so much so much. But as all of them begin to take shape in me, I realise, the efforts that I've been relying on have only granted me the extra caution, which in any case may not be what my level of development may lead to.
That is, today I'm disappointed. At this very instant, I am, very much, disappointed. I am human after all, so that's pretty hard to put the blame on me. But nevertheless, I just wanna pray continuously for the Lord to help me achieve what I've learnt. Knowing and doing; knowing and applying. People have been telling me about various comment which I could but to only agree, yet practising what they preach remain something far beyond. Shall not elaborate, because problem seem to lie in me. Everytime I get involve in a group, it always, almost very naturally, occur in me, that I'm bound to be satisfied in one way or the other. So for that, I'm praying hard too. Help me, guide me. And yea, do pray for me. Very much appreciated.
I've scrolled up and down the MSN contacts. Should I talk to chuwen (who's not online), or should I talk to Shanna (whom none of the conversation I've had with can sustain beyond), or should I talk to Jia En (whom is unlikely to even know what I'm gonna talk to her about), or should I talk to Eunice (whom I always say hi best friend and the conversation ends there), or should I talk to Joel (who's currently resting and his interest level remains doubtful), or should I talk to... Hm... All in all, I'm becoming more unwilling to let my rantings out, like literally. Turn to God I guess.
Yesterday, I had one such particular instant. X was making the card, but apparently, hogging it too much. I wanted to say, but didn't know how to put it the nice way. So I end up becoming pissed, and then quiet, and then didn't want to care until this morning when I'm touching up, I realise there were so much that I'm not satisfied with. Really, I could have stepped in and since Y was having a suggestion that might help, I could really have stepped in and let Y take over. Or even, I could have really stepped in myself, since I'm the one having so many comments to make. Someone please teach me how to be the bad guy without appearing too bad. It's a really touchy stuff to even begin with.
Today, I'm stuck in that same mud pool again. I mean when I've came by that mud pool a zillion times, and I do nothing about it, ultimately, I will just get myself stuck in it every time I take the same trek. So there I am, getting myself soaked in all the mud and dirt, and struggling to pull myself out of it.
Here's how it goes. X, Y and perhaps even Z have become somehow closer recently. And somehow all of us came to this common consensus that we should not do something for the wrong reasons, but yet, unfortunately they are still doing it, or maybe that's very much what I'm thinking, which may be yet wrong as was mentioned above. Shall reserve a little of what I thought, but up there, I'm thinking perhaps a little appreciation should be shown. Especially when it's to a stranger showing hospitality and kindness to do us a favour? Hm... I've no idea why I'm so worked up about this, but... Oh well, it just shows how much work I've to do in order to bridge the lapse, the one between what my consciousness has guided me to achieve and how my mentality and thoughts are struggling to catch up.
Posted by Judah at 8/29/2009 06:49:00 AM
Friday, August 28, 2009
Fear of death has never been this real before. The christian identity has a part to play in this perhaps, but I was caught so off-handed. The news was broke. As I was about to dine in, the eldest daughter of my neighbouring old man knocked on the door looking for my mom. "My dad passed away already..." That was the best I could gather from their conversation, a half-whisper one.
Suddenly, there was an upswell in my heart. The kind which is very much akin to a heartache. Somehow, I hope I had a little more time. Somehow, I felt the urge to evangelise. Somehow, I hope I had done a little more. Somehow, somehow, somehow, I was so lost. A state of internal panic, where many things seem out of place.
At a ripe old age of 18, it's hard to believe that the boy still doesn't know the true meaning of the word "death". Dictionary defines it as an eventual outcome when life is finally lost. Everyone knows that death is a grave matter, both literally and metaphorically, but how many are actually aware of the many things that the mere term entails. Sadness, an inevitable sentiment shared by many, has hit me particularly hard this time round.
With the utensils in my either hand, the realisation paused the time around me. My head was bowed, eyes were looking straight at the piece of tile in front of me, but nothing seemed to register. Indeed, perhaps that piece of news came too quickly. Uncle suffered from stroke sometime ago, but the idea of death did not come come across as a possibility before. Intellectually, we knew death would come eventually; yet subconciously, humans tend to mask that fear, or at the very least numb it, with distractions. Yes, death would come, but not anytime soon. Perhaps?
But as I bowed down, the unexplained aching spoke to my heart. Evangelism is a pressing issue, because many are dying everyday. Evangelism has to be carried out all the time to all in all places.
Please pray for my family- my mom, dad, sisters, brothers and anyone around us. Pray that God will soften their hearts and open up their eyes, so that one day, one fine day, they will come to know Him, and acknowledge Him as the saviour of our lives. Thank You!
For He said, as two or more gather in His name, His presence will be amidst us. Please pray for us. Thank you=)
Strangely, I was not at all close to him, but I vaguely remember once when I was struggling to put on my shoes while standing he offered me a seat on the bench he placed outside his house. I never thought that impression could be so lasting...
Dear Lord, please work your wonders and help us bring many many people to you, for we are aware of Your gracefulness, and we are aware of how much You desire for the salvation of many many! Amen!
Posted by Judah at 8/28/2009 02:49:00 AM
Thursday, August 27, 2009
God is so so so good=) Praise Him and love Him=)
Posted by Judah at 8/27/2009 04:03:00 AM
Wednesday, August 26, 2009
Today's a good day, one which I've been pretty much looking forward to. Sharing session was filled with much anticipation, and whatever that followed was unable to mar over it . Having skipped school on Monday, I finally got a very first and very own quiet time in the morning which was pretty good. Continuous praying confirmed that indeed God is good. Thank Him for guiding me all the while.
Sharing was from Matthew 3. 3 pointers to note: 1. Change (growth), 2. humility, and finally 3. dependence (obedience). God's presence was so strong that I lost track of the time. All of us were almost late for assembly.
Lessons were fine, but statistics were disaster. I couldn't even identify the correct one to apply.
Self-initiated blessing campaign was supposed to be the whole of this week, beginning from Monday, but it was only until today that all of us finally set off to actions. Response was good, despite 2 rejections. But nevertheless, thank you God for softening the hearts of most, and for teaching us to rely in Your strength and provision all the time!
Today I finally has my first taste of Popeye's. Ever since the last time when Helena and Reuben tempted me with the ever-so-nice mashed potato, I've always been wanting to get one for myself, but had been unable to do so. Today was the day and it tasted fine. Haha, a little overrated, but not too bad still.
Service was good today, and Martin from South Africa came. He taught us about the river of God, and about discipleship. One important point that imprinted deep onto my heart was the concentric circle starting from the random settings of cities or villages at the outermost, zooming down into the circle of the general public, then the people who are curious to find out and had gathered, then the believers of God, then the disciples who follow God, then the selected few who took on the role of leaders to guide the rest, and finally Jesus Himself. The growth is inwards. Draw one yourself and be blessed by it=) (side note: perhaps that could be the direction any evangelistic activities should be targetting and heading in=))
He taught us a worship tune that is sung in the most common tongue in South Africa, the Northern Sotho:
Re A mo Leboga (x3)
Modamo wa rona
(We thank you our God)
Ga Go ya tswanang le wena (x3)
Modamo wa rona
(There is no one like You)
O Dira Mehlolo (x3)
Modamo wa rona
(You work miracles)
Awesome piece of music. Praise be to the Lord for He deserves so much more. On the other hand, we are so undeserving and yet our Father never fails to look after our need for He is the most gracious, He is the most loving, He is the most Holy! Hallelujah!
Posted by Judah at 8/23/2009 04:38:00 AM
Saturday, August 22, 2009
It's been really long since the last. Thanks so much to our wonderful Abba God, that I'm enjoying the most peaceful period of all times in my life, even when the exams are near, even when times seem as bad as it could be. It was Him who made me realise of so many things, of how insignificant material life is.
Today, we went to EeWen's church for the radicle service and it was really good I guess. Attendance check: Ee Wen, Roy, Nicholas and Kenneth Chew brothers, Justin, Angeline, Sheng Chuan, Dawn, Xiang Yu and finally me. Apologies if I missed out any, but that were the few whom I know, and it certainly felt like a good concert! Hallelujah for all, for such an opportunity to come and worship Him, even for Singapore.
Compelling compassion (ponder over it)
-if God says go and give up everything to help the poor, then go ahead without asking, for God knows what is best. Do not prioritise anything above Him, not even money.
Posted by Judah at 8/22/2009 07:55:00 AM
Saturday, August 15, 2009
And a nice song:
Posted by Judah at 8/15/2009 10:26:00 PM
A really nice movie:
Posted by Judah at 8/15/2009 10:23:00 PM
Tuesday, August 11, 2009
Praise the Lord!!
Posted by Judah at 8/11/2009 06:43:00 AM
Monday, August 10, 2009
This is darn cool!!!
Posted by Judah at 8/10/2009 07:48:00 AM
Sunday, August 9, 2009
3 nights stay over at sister's house summarised in photos:
Midnight supper (bean curd and fried dough stuff at Mustafa. Yum yum=))
Nephew getting all his face muscle into actions! The dou hua was not bad, but the queue was exaggeratingly long!
Marina barrage after supper
Sweeping waves
Happy birthday singapore! I'm not sure what this is, but it's in the barrage area!
The long spiral! Quite a nice walk=)
Study!!!! The basketball court is just at the other side of the window! what a contrast!
Next up: back to Zoo after more than 6years!
Posted by Judah at 8/09/2009 08:40:00 AM
I finally found the song I like so so so so much!!!!
Nobody knows who I really am
I never felt this empty before
And if I ever need someone to come along
Who's gonna comfort me and keep me strong
We are all rowing the boat of fate
The waves keep on comin' and we can't escape
But if we ever get lost on our way
The waves would guide you through another day
Tookude iki wo shiteru toumei ni nattamitai
Kurayami ni omoe takedo mekaku shisarete tadake
Inori wo sasagete atarashii hi wo matsu
Azayaka ni hikaru umi sono hate made
Nobody knows who I really am
Maybe they just don't give a damn
But if I ever need someone to come along
I know you would follow me, and keep me strong
Hito no kokoro wa utsuri yuku nukedashita kunaru
Tsuki wa mata atarashii shuuki de fune wo tsureteku
And every time I see your face,
The oceans heave up to my heart
You make me wanna strain at the oars,
And soon I can see the shore
Oh, I can see the shore
When will I.... can see the shore?
I want you to know who I really am
I never thought I'd feel this way towards you
And if you ever need someone to come along
I will follow you, and keep you strong
Tabi wa mada tsudzuiteku odayakana hi mo
Tsuki wa mata atarashii shuuki de fune wo terashidasu
Inori wo sasagete atarashii hi wo matsu
Azayaka ni hikaru umi sono hate made
And every time I see your face,
The oceans heave up to my heart
You make me wanna strain at the oars,
And soon I can see the shore
Unmei no fune wo kogi
nami wa tsugi kara tsugi e to
Watashitachi wo osou kedo
Sore mo suteki na tabi ne
Dore mo suteki na tabi ne
Posted by Judah at 8/09/2009 07:28:00 AM
Friday, August 7, 2009
Part 2 (CHANGE)
Jay Austin is the boss of a car trade business, who used to conduct his businesses with dishonest acts. One day, a certain something struck him and he fell into a state of confusion. The result from that was a changed man who continually trusts in God even in times of trials and difficulties, which eventually allowed him to enjoy the abundant blessings God has for us- a reflective instance of God’s promise in John 15:5 which says “I am the vine, you are the branches. If a man remains in me and I in him, he will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.”
Anyway, I shall not spoil the movie. It’s entitled “flying wheel”, so do watch it if you are interested, and be blessed in every possible way.
Today’s meet-up was unofficially themed “change”, and everything just settled in so well. Change is not only a process that stops when one has successfully transformed from an admirer of Christ to a follower of His, but is a lifelong journey that requires continual replenishment! Praise the Lord for staying with us all the time, even when we dishonour Him in the things that we do, for that He is a merciful Lord who is quick to love but slow to anger. Because of that all men were given opportunities to be saved, but the meanest of the mean, the most stubborn of the stubborn stand in the way. Let us not be swayed by that, let our faith not be wavered by that. Lord, please continue to bless us with Your unmatchable prowess, watch over us as we continue on this journey with you, committing us into Your very own hands. Dear Lord, guide us in whatever we do, so that our faith will be completed by the deeds that You have so desired. Shine a path of righteousness ahead of us, because we are aware that in every path that we takes, You have already taken it before us. In Jesus name, Amen!
Posted by Judah at 8/07/2009 11:05:00 AM
part 1 (CHANGE!)
Today the group of us finally had a gathering of our very own, organised by none other than ourselves. When I mentioned the group of us, I’m referring to Roy, Ee Wen, Angelina and of course, me myself.
Until now, the sessions had lasted for a whole 3 weeks, and I just want to thank our most dear Father so much for all the things, and most importantly, for watching over us and blessing us with blessings that are most suitable for us.
Just 3 weeks ago, Roy had talked to me about how God had spoken to him over his quiet time about conducting some discussion session with some of the fellow Christians from our class. Apparently, similar information was conveyed to the two girls, and 4 of us came together on the next immediate morning to flagship the activity. Initially, it was a theme-less random sharing of almost anything and everything that surfaced from our mind. I want to thank God for that as well, because I am fully aware that it was Him who filled us with all those thoughts and materials that had turned out so meaningful for us, that eventually leads to the sustaining of the prayer group.
Of course, there were times of awkward moments when all of us basically came to a halt in the midst of a discussion; there were also moments of disappointment when friends came and go. For that, I want to thank God too, for the strength that He has so generously showered us with, to help us persevere and overcome each obstacle with faith and the knowledge that He’s always with us. Thank you Father!
Then, the ever-loving Father of ours continued His work in us which He had so faithfully embarked on even before the creation of the world. Our “cell group” evolved. It’s so pleasing to hear about the good news, and even more so when we were involved in the creation of this piece of news. Very quickly, our group decided to “pay a weekly visit” to Ee Wen’s church’s group and praise the Lord, for we all know that He was the one who removed all barriers of unfamiliarity and discomfort to bring together strangers of many many different wakes to partake in His words- our only source of the truth. It’s amazing how quickly we settled down, and I particularly enjoyed the 2-songs worship each time before the beginning of the sharing. Who puts the stars in the sky and know them by names, Your are amazing Lord! Indeed! Our God is so amazing, so indescribable, so uncontainable!
Thank you Lord for also enriching us all the time with all the knowledge You have in store for all of us. We love because You first loved us. The love You showered us with is so abundant that it overflows to touch the people around us. Henceforth, we shall not judge, we shall not prejudice, nor shall we hate, because that love from You encompasses even the unlovable; that love from You encompasses even the detested; that love from You encompasses all Your creations!
There came a period when I was so worried that perhaps that pace that we were progressing was too fast (it was actually only the beginning of the third week, but by saying the word “period”, it certainly felt really really long). Past experience convinced me that we should slow down and pray about it, but that certainly wasn’t enough to deter the passionate Ee Wen and Roy. Instead, I was the one who was persuaded to swop side. For God softened my heart- obeying Him doesn’t mean to be discouraged from doing His work, but instead to be encouraged to continually trust in Him that He will do His part as we embark on the mission He had so trustingly entrusted us with.
So here comes today. Attendance check (apart from the 4 supposed “organisers”): Xiu Hui, Alvin and Beatrice. I just want to thank God for such an encouragement for us. No doubt, the figure was far below the number of invitations that we had sent out, but in Him do we trust. These are exactly whom He had in mind, for a start, and the fact that a non-17/08 joined us is all that is required to declare hallelujah! Thank you Father, so much so much!
All of us gathered in His name at Roy’s house to conduct today’s session, which included Ee Wen’s sharing, followed by an evangelistic movie titled “Flying Wheels”, and finally my sharing. EW talked about the parables of the 10 virgins from Matthew about how we should prepare for Jesus’ second coming. The film was a huge highlight- which definitely evoked a huge AMEN in all our hearts. On a side note, the guy who acted as Jay Austin did have a huge resemblance to our vice principal, Mr Aziz. Main jeez of the film was about how we should act in accordance to what was taught by Him, about how we should conduct ourselves in a God-like manner.
=Love
